I was diagnosed with dyslexia (reading/spelling and math) in the third grade and have grappled with it ever since. I attended a challenging private school where everyone knew about my dyslexia. One sunny day, my class walked over to the library. Everyone had picked out a book, including myself. As we were leaving, the librarian stopped me in front of the whole class and said, "You can't check out that book unless you can tell me what the title says." A flood of fear rushed through my veins. I was busted. Why couldn't she let me be just like everyone else, even if it was just for that one moment? I was just going to go home and have my mom read it to me anyway...
I spit out the first thing that came to mind, "Fairy Tales" (RFYAIT STLAE is FAIRY TALES jumbled up). I'll never forget her surprised smile that crept cheek to cheek. I guessed right. She patted me on the back and let me run along with my other classmates.
I didn't realize how horrific this incident was until I got older and reflected on it. My dyslexia took an enormous toll on my self confidence, considering I thought I was stupid for the majority of my childhood. Every day I would come home and cry for hours in my mom's bed, screaming, "I'm stupid! I'm stupid! I just don't get it like everyone else." (the reason I placed the book on bed sheets).
It took me a while to build back my self confidence. There wasn't anything I thought I was good at until I found photography. I didn't even think I was good at that until more and more people started to compliment my work. Now, it doesn't even matter if I'm a "good" photographer or not. It's the source of my delight and no one will ever be able to take that away again.
Why is it that scientists or mathematicians aren't ever ridiculed for not being good artists? I've been made fun of plenty of times for not being able to do a math problem correctly. It just blows my mind that people use artistic resources everyday (listening to music, enjoying art/photos, etc.) yet they're not valued nearly as much as the subjects listed above.
In conclusion, I've come to realize that I really wouldn't want to be any other way. It's made me fill the shoes that I wear today. It's taken me a while to say this but, I wasn't stupid. I just didn't get it.
Thanks for reading,
Skye Battles
